GOP lines up behind financial reform!

McConnell pitches Financial Reform
S.F. Nooffub
1 April 2010
(STMNews) Senate Minority Leader Mitch McConnell (R-KY) today announced his whole-hearted support for sweeping reform of America's financial system. "We can't have 'too-big-too-fail banks'", Senator McConnell declared. "Without strict regulation of the financial sector, we're doomed to see another melt-down of the American economy. President Reagan was wrong. In this case, Government is the solution!"

Senator McConnell's announcement shocked Senate Democrats, but was taken in stride by his GOP colleagues. "Of course we need stricter regulation of financial markets", declared Sen. John Kyl (R-AZ). "Recent economic history proves that unregulated markets are destined to fail!"

On the House side, Minority Leader Boehner (R-OH) remarked, "I'm working closely with Speaker Pelosi to craft a strong, bipartisan bill placing strict limits on all major financial institutions in this country. We simply cannot afford to repeat the mistakes of the past."

Who'd a-thunk?